Beer Quotes

Submitted by: Michael Dong
December 11, 2000

This page is dedicated to one of life's more delicate indulgences, beer. The following quotes were sent to me by one of my climbing partners, Michael "did you know my last name is a body part" Dong. Michael obviously knows me well. To all you dedicated beer drinkers of the world, Scholl!

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true, than be selfish and worry about my liver. And doggone it, people like beer!"

Jack Handy

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Frank Sinatra

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with fools.

Ernest Hemingway

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?

W.C. Fields

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

Henny Youngman

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case.  Coincidence?

Stephen Wright

When we drink, we get drunk.  When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we
fall asleep, we commit no sin.  When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!

Brian O'Rourke

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Benjamin Franklin

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.
Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel
does not go nearly as well with pizza.

Dave Barry

To some its a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group.

Roscoe Hodson

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.

Oscar Wilde

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.

Humphrey Bogart